Migraines

Greetings from the wannabe Ujena girl. I promised I would talk about what has been going on, so here goes. I am a migraineur. This word may not mean much to some of you, but what it means, essentially is that I suffer from Migraines. I know, how can one person get so lucky? I get these little treats on average three to four times a month. I don’t get through a two-week period without getting one. It sucks, all the way around, and it makes it tough to exercise. My doctor is trying a new treatment for it; the only problem is that it makes me tired. Really, really tired (like as in sit in one place to long and you may drop into a coma tired). So the past two weeks have been pretty slack in terms of fitness. YIKES! My first photos are just around the corner so I need to get back on the program.
I posted this today mostly to remind everyone that the pursuit of fitness can be tough. It’s even tougher when you have a “valid” excuse, like a child. It can be easier to leave the gym stuff in the bag then to try and juggle a working mom’s schedule to work out.
I can tell you from the past two weeks. I have been edgy, jittery and quick to anger. In short, I have not been the mom I want to be. What’s the big difference? I haven’t been working out.
This makes me realize that working out makes me a better mom. Change the equation, don’t make it as time for you, and realize that the time you take to exercise is time that your family can benefit from.
I am making the promise to myself right now; I will get up at five in the morning and do my workout. I will do it not only because I desperately want to compete at BikiniJam, but also because it makes me a better mom, I feel better and I enjoy it (once I get started). It gives me a feeling of accomplishment and starts my day off on the right foot.
Go on, make the promise to yourself. You know you need to.

YIKES!

This week I leaned about two types of epiphany moments. I am forever going to refer to this as “Ah-ha!” and “Yikes!” moments. They are positive and negative, respectively,
My Ah-ha moment came along when I tried on two pairs of pants this week. They were both two sizes smaller than I was wearing, size ten versus size twelve, and they fit.
I was feeling pretty good about myself. I sent emails to my sister, and told my best friend, both of which replied with much congratulations and praises. I strolled about, felling like the queen bee. I came; I exercised and was now reaping the benefits, right?

All was right with my world. I was becoming (albeit slower than I liked) a lean, mean, modelling machine.

Unfortunately, a "Yikes" came right after. As part of the training I am in, it’s required that I learn how to behave myself running a press conference. It was my lucky day that they chose to film these moments that we practiced our mock scrums. Other students, for the record, make the toughest reporters I have ever seen. I was sweating just a little during my conference, but the real fun came later. We got to watch out television debuts. I know that I am always my worst critic, but I honestly did not expect what I saw on that TV screen. When did my face get so fat, and so melty? I was shocked and depressed by what I saw that day, not only because I didn’t do that great a job running the conference and the Q&A, but because I was shocked. I know they “camera adds ten pounds”, but how many cameras were actually filming? Twenty?

Feels even worse because I know I haven’t been keeping up on my exercise plan as much as I should be. I’ll talk about that next blog. Cheers!

In love with cardio - or gotta run!

So I am officially in love with running. Hard to believe I know, but the love affair has begun! I ran 4 K the other day and although it doesn't seem like much, one more kilometer and I can run the 5K at the Bikini Jam.

That's a big deal.

Because I want to win.

I am also starting to see big changes in my body, clothes are fitting better, and in some cases, much looser. This is also great news! I know I can keep it up and show those young models what for! I have also started taking Hot Yoga again and am thinking about ballet. It seems odd, I know, but here's the deal, a model (especially swimsuit model) that is comfortable and aware of how her body moves will be more successful on camera than one that doesn't. I can't take credit, I saw an interview with a very successful swimwear model and she said that very thing. So I may soon have to invest in ballet slippers!

I had a great chat with Ujena today. They are so encouraging and supportive. I would definitely push anyone that is has a great idea or needs some encouragement to check them out, what a great company.

Today is kind of a slow day. I was really bored at work (dreaming about going somewhere warm) and yesterday was supposed to be my hard workout. It wasn't, so I get to go out today. I just have to wait until my hubby gets home so he can be a Daddy when I am busy being a runner. I am going to be meeting with my first photog soon, and am also going to chat with some models, makeup and hair people to pump them for information. Don't worry, I will post all advice and make sure everyone gets use of all of it, why should I be the only one that looks great out there, right?

Take care!

All I want for Christmas is to be in shape and not sick!

Hello all,

I ma been so busy and sick the past little while - what a PITA! I have been in the Running Room's running course (Learn to Run for Women Only). I would recommend this course to anyone that has ever wanted to start running. It is so fun and inspiring! I am up to almost 4 kms, one more and I am ready for the Fun Run next Bikini Jam YAY me!

Sad news, I have realized that in order to get into the kind of shape I want to, in the time frame I have in mind I will need to..are you ready...start getting up super early. YUCK!

I think every mom needs to come to that choice, at least the ones that work. Even though I can justify spending a few nights a week (three) at the gym while my daughter is in either activities or in child care, I can't do it every night. I barely see her as is! So the plan (as soon as I am feeling better) is to start working out early in the morning. Kind of sucks, but that's the way it is.

Promise to post more regular now!

Donna

Words to dance by...

Music is powerful. Just a careful arrangement of notes can inspire, enrage, sadden or elate the spirit. It is some interesting to experience your own reaction to various music and songs. Whether classical or contemporary there is some beautiful music out there and I was thinking the other day as I drove home from work about the importance of music in my life. My daughter and I sing on the way to and from school almost every day (as long as I don’t have a really bad headache) and we both love listening to the radio, but what about more than that?

There will always be songs that will remind me of both good and bad times in my life. There are so many songs that have a place in my memories and each day I am surprised by the trigger caused by another one. Here are a few that stand out…

When I was younger I had my favorite kid’s songs, “Down by the Bay” and some French kids songs (L’Oncle Jules, Voyageur) recall days of splashed sunshine and playing outside for hours. We never had to worry about things like cardio or lifting weights then, exercise came naturally when playing hide-and-seek or bike riding to the ice-cream store.

The first few records I owned were second had 45s (remember them) from my parents. The Everly Brothers, Buddy Holly and Del Shannon. One of my first new records was Michael Jackson’s “Billy Jean”. We also raided my parent’s LP collection, I remember my sister and I scaring each other with the spooky intro to “You Took the Words (Right Out of My Mouth)” by Meatloaf.

“Love Bites” by Def Leppard never ceases to bring back the flood of memories of my first junior high dance, and the older boy, Jared Segal, that also groped my butt while we were swaying in a circle. I was so nervous and not entirely comfortable, but what was I going to do at that point? My friends were all watching, so I let it pass. I remember him mentioning that I was trembling. My first dance with an older boy, you bet I was shaking!

During Basic Training the juke box in the mess had one song everyone liked – “I Guess that’s why They Call It the Blues”. I will always remember sitting in the mess with a group of fellow recruits singing along (very drunk and at the top of our lungs) to this Elton John classic.

“Sanctuary” by The Cult will always remind me of a much-maligned ex-boyfriend, Dan that had a cassette in his car that consisted entirely of versions of this song. Ian Astbury’s voice may be impressive but after the fifth version I was ready to hear something else. My very sweet first boyfriend, Chris’ anthem is “When I’m With You” by Sheriff. I often wonder about him and hope wherever he is, he is happy. He also has the distinction of sharing most of Metallica’s catalogue with the other members of the basement band I use to listen rehearse when visiting. Keith, still a good friend, has the honor of a few country tunes, including “Indian Outlaw” and “Devil went Down to Georgia”. Rich, another ex gets the unfortunate honor of “Sometimes Love Just Ain’t Enough”.

My own husband and soul mate has many, but especially our song from our dance at our social “Can’t Fight This Feeling” and our wedding song, “When You Say Nothing At All”, I also think of him when the song “Hero” by Enrique plays, even with all it’s over-wrought emotion and obvious cheesy-ness.

Music is powerful, just look at the use of music in movies. How many do not react in some way to the Star Wars theme? Emperor’s march (from Star Wars)? Superman theme? The heavy strings of Jaws?

Music can also be powerful in exercise. It can motivate (personal music), entertain (group class) and keep pace (spin class). Before you work out, give serious thought to what music motivates you. Think back to times in your life when you couldn’t help but move to the music. Put your favorites together. Who cares if they are recent or from High School. This is your personal soundtrack; you aren’t programming a radio station. ON my player right now is George Michael, Enigma, Kool Moe Dee, Justin Timberlake, King Floyd and Evanescence to name a few. Plan your workout to coincide with the music, start off slower, build, climax, then cool-down.

My current faves when the work gets tough? “Lose Yourself” by Eminem and “Bring Me To Life” Evanescence. Rocking tune that last one. It begs to be sung along to, as loud as possible. I will disagree with one thing - one lyric from this song is “Save me from the nothing I’ve become.”

Here’s a newsflash for all you other work-out mamas out there. You aren’t nothing. You are powerful. You are a mom. You are beautiful. You don’t need anyone to save you.

Repeat after me: “Screw it. I’ll save myself.”

My mission...or goal...or whatever lofty ambition...

I am like a lot of thirty year old new-ish moms. I am starting to get comfortable in the role of mother, I am wrestling with guilt about going back to work and am somewhat unhappy with my post-natal weight loss efforts. I am getting older, and starting to feel like age may actually be something that I can not avoid. As the mother of a daughter I try everyday to remember not to say anything bad about the way I look, in case I emotionally scar my precious child beyond repair and send her shrieking into therapy.

So, like most women in my situation I have decided to enter a swimsuit modelling contest with a bunch of college age beauties.

Pardon me?

No, seriously. I decided the best way to kick my own butt was the set the bar high, and what bar could be higher than participating in the Bikini Jam offered by Ujena? I have seen the catalogues and the websites, these are some beautiful, fit (young) women.

These girls do not know what a stretch mark is, they think cellulite is something grannies get and can still “Eat whatever I want and not gain a pound.” Their entire lives revolve around partying, boyfriends, school and working out.

Me? I am turning 31 this year have a three year old daughter and a looong way to go. I work full-time and am taking a challending correspondence course for the army. I should also mention my husband occasionally likes to spend a few minutes with me from time to time. I am not (yet) fit, and am not quite 18 year old anymore. Does that mean that the expiry date on my chances is long past?

HELL NO!

I have decided that I CAN do THIS, and moreover, if I can, so can anyone! I am not rich, I will be doing this the old-fashioned way (on the cheap). There are no shortcuts for me, no plastic surgery, no home gym full of expensive equipment.

I am an officer cadet in the Canadian army, I know what it is like to get my ass kicked, and now I have to do it again. This next year will be a struggle. Sometimes is will be humourous (I am not a natural exerciser by any stretch and use humour to break the ice), sometimes it may be sad but I can promise two things, it will always be challenging (read that as really, really hard) and it will be entertaining. Over the next year I am going to work-out, train and learn everything I can about being a success at the next Bikini Jam. I am not going into this just to have fun, I am serious about making a good showing. I admit I am not starting from square one, I have the rudimentary equipment necessary, I modelled (when I was 19), so I know I am reasonably attractive. I have taken a lot of acting classes, so I am fairly comfortable out there.

I want to show the world of moms out there that it isn’t too late, that if you have a dream (however unrealistic it may seem) you need to go for it and make it happen. My dream was to be a model or actress when I was younger, I gave it up to pursue “responsible” goals. I want to travel, write about my experiences, make some cash and be able to say one day that I tried once upon a time to reach the stars. I want to inspire my own daughter that whatever she wants she is no only capable, but morally bound to make her dreams come true.

Time to be irresponsible.

Is it time to put on a bikini and stride confidently in front of strangers that will not only be looking, but also photographing, and judging?

You bet!

I am woman, here me ROAR!

One of those weeks...

Yep, one of those days when you are pretty sure that you have bitten off more than you can chew? I am so tired I want to just pass out. Of course, I can't because I have a Darby running around. At least she makes me smile.
Getting up at six is just no fun. I admit it, I got spoiled by lounging about for part of the morning. Some days I didn't even get dressed until around lunch. Not anymore. I have to hit the ground running at six, get dressed right away and then wake Darby up. Just waking her up takes about twenty minutes. At least she isn't grumpy. She is smiley and cuddly. Thank God! After I drop her off at daycare I head to work where I am in training. This is one complicated job. Everyday this week (I started on Monday) I have brought my gym stuff with every intention of working out. I am just too tired by day's end. I am obviously going to have to wait until I get used to the early mornings.

My plan is still to be "in shape" by late fall/early winter. It will happen. Because I will make it happen.

New Job, New Routine - so exciting!

So I start my new job at the end of August! I am so excited! The job sounds really interesting and the extra money will help out so much, but even more than that, gym access! Everyday after work I can cross the street and hopefully have a great workout in an hour or less. Darby will still be at daycare (or as we are calling it, school) so I can have some "me" time. I am so looking forward to it!

The other great thing is that some other moms are going to join me sometimes. They also have access to that gym, so it will be so nice to know that I have a group meeting me sometimes. It is so much easier for women to go if they know someone else is counting on them. Even easier than just doing it for yourself. Isn't that so typical for a mom, everything for someone else?